The Male Burka


Often labelled a "security risk", or a "flag of fundamentalism", the traditional Male burka is at the very least described by experts as a sign of conservative modesty.

What is it?

The male burka covers the man’s torso, and upper arms - in an entirely black garment. Other times the upper arm portion might be cut off - furthering ones ascension into macho superiority, particularly during a fine winter’s morning.

Sometimes the garment may sport a white logo, which allows the male to pledge allegiance to a superior power.

While 96% of males have one in their wardrobe, you'll find the more fundamentalist types roaming together in packs of uniformity.

Is anyone forced to wear the Male Burka?

Conservative and modest, often the main motive for dressing in the garment is said to be societal oppression as people confuse “comfort” for clothing that allows a male to express the personality of a cold fish.

Shane, a humble male in a signature Male Burka, said “I’ve been smashing the gym last few days, so why the f*** not?”

“It’s comfortable knowing I can blend into the crowd and wear exactly what my mates wear,” he told MR. KOYA

Dr Martin from MR. KOYA University said that some males often felt a sense of empowerment when donning the male burka.

“It’s a push back against political correctness and fashion globalism, a rebellion which says ‘sorry world I don’t care what you think, so I’m going basic’.

The existing fashion establishment

However Dr Martins does concede it may be women who are pressuring men into covering themselves with the black garment.

"There is a possibility that some women would tell their husbands or boyfriends 'please wear the male burka as I don't want any other women to see you might have a sense of style, personality or ability to banter' which in that case is possessive," he said.

End of the day it may be worn for any number of cultural reasons.

Should the male burka be banned?

More men are growing disillusioned with the assertion that not caring what others think, means slipping on the most basic of cloth. Indeed that is what the extremists want – to control you with fear.   

While deportation may be taking things too far, an emerging group are redefining “fresh casual style” whether you’re at a beach BBQ, a dodgy Berlin night club, or an outdoor illuminati sex party.

It's definitely not a fashion contest, wear what represents you. And if that's a basic male burka (or female burka…) - then power to you my friend.

On the other hand, experts have found that throwing in flavour often makes things taste better.

So relax brother and watch this space.

*If you have seen any strange behaviour, or anything which doesn’t add up, please email the Male Burka Hotline via hey@mrkoya.com. The public plays a major role in reporting any suspicious activity. Even reporting the most basic of garments can be valuable to the ongoing investigation. Share to show you care.

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